U2 was pretty amazing on Sunday. If you weren’t there, I am sad for you. While I was there, I witnessed some pretty poor concert etiquette. As such, I feel it is my duty to enlighten you as to some things you should not do at a concert.

5. Argue with the security. If the security says you’re leaving, you are leaving. If you put up a fight, you will leave in pain. So whether you snuck in, snuck an underage drink, or snuck a contraband smoke, you should probably not try to sneak away from security when they come for you. That is, unless you want to be the reason behind an “Oh snap guys, you’ll never believe what I just saw” text.

4. Insult the song that is being played. Okay, so, your favorite band is playing what is, in your opinion, their worst song. Seeing as we all have different opinions (whoa), it’s entirely possible that the guy next to you really, really likes that song. And, if the person you’re offending isn’t a mild-mannered music journalist, they’re likely to yell derogatory things at you, and/or get up in your face, depending on the crowd you’re watching with (this is an especially bad tactic at a metal show, for – I hope – obvious reasons).

3. Scream for a band to play a song. I’ve been on stage at Cain’s Ballroom, and I noticed one thing: you can’t hear anything except a roar from the audience. Even if you are up in the very front row, hollering out for a band to play your favorite song makes about as much sense as yelling at the characters in horror movies to not go into the woods. If you’re in the cheap seats, it makes about as much sense as trying to make your confessions to the Pope while you’re sitting in Oklahoma.

2. Get totally wasted. Yes, alcohol and concerts go together great. But if you’re so sloshed that you’re using the people in front of you to stand up straight, you are entirely too drunk. Not only are you probably going to waste as much beer as you drink by spilling it on people, the unlucky patrons whose head and shoulders you are using for stabilization might not always be a mild-mannered music journalist and friend.

1. Leave before the encore. Are people not aware that there is no such thing as an unscripted encore? U2 had not one but two scripted encores. Still, there were people leaving the first time that U2 left the stage. The house lights didn’t come up; there was almost no way that people could be confused that the concert was truly over. Still, I saw people purposefully walking toward their vehicles, bumping into people and spilling beers, completely ignoring the fact that “Where the Streets Have No Name” and “With or Without You” had yet to be played. This boggles my mind. Not only is poor etiquette to be jostling and knee-knocking all the people patiently waiting for the encore, they’re missing out on more music that they paid to see. I just don’t get it. Is not waiting in traffic that important? Pfft.

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Cain's Ballroom, the Pope, U2